Amendments to the Rules of The Nice Girl Project

I hate Halloween. It's great for the kids, and I'm all for Trick-or-Treating, but once you're old enough to get drunk, Halloween is for idiots. This is how I've felt for the past decade, until...True Blood. To sum it up, this show is sexy, scandalous, refreshing...and it always leaves me wanting me be in the middle of a vampire sandwich having my blood sucked between two cold, naked bodies. So I was actually excited a couple of months ago when I inadvertently stumbled across the waitress uniform from Merlotte's that Sookie Stackhouse wears. I bought it immediately and, like an idiot, got excited for Halloween for once. Unfortunately Halloween turned out to be a frustrating evening of entry lines, bathroom lines, drink lines...and without coke lines, it was intolerable, not to mention completely unexpected since we paid almost double for VIP tickets to avoid such nuisances. To top it all off, I bumped into Bachelor #1...remember him? The 25 year old narcissistic actor with the girlfriend? Anyhoo, the entire evening left me in a Stoli Bluberi-fueled rage, and the Nice Girl left the building. Thinking back, it has come to my attention that I need to make some amendments to the rules of The Nice Girl Project:

No swearing
No evil, crook, or stink eye
No yelling at bouncers
No physical scuffles with friends who are trying to calm me down
No flashing single nipples to my neighbours...or double for that matter
No use of the word "douchebag" or any similar spin on the word, including "douche", "doucher", or "douchestick"

I have a swear jar on the desk at work. My assistant said that I swore about 50 times when I told her the Halloween night details...RATS this is going to be harder than I thought. (She was nice of enough to allow it, since technically speaking, the swear jar hadn't been made yet). So starting now, the amendments are in place. Fuck. Okay, starting now.