Ghosts from Neighbours Past

No, I am not on my deathbed. No, I have not been so wasted for the past 4 weeks that I haven't been able to type. The weirdest thing has happened...for the past month, I've been acting like a grown-up. Well, I'm assuming I am, I've never actually done this before. I go to the gym every day, I bake cookies, I build gingerbread houses, I change my apartment decor to match the season, and I keep my legs closed, you know...like a lady. In fact, it has recently come to my attention that I may be in love with my friend's brother, and I now find myself saving my virgin body for him in case it ever pans out. Can I call myself a virgin if I haven't had sex for a month? I think so. Is it possible that four weeks of being a Nice Girl have changed me forever? I also think so...

Since The Nice Girl Project 2.0 is going so swimmingly, I'm going to have to share with you something that happened to me about 3 years ago...not only is it an amazing story, but I have no new ones to share on account of my new-found Angelicism.

My apartment building is about 20 feet away from the next building in my complex. When I first moved in, I had noticed that my "neighbour" in the next building liked to sun tan regularly on his patio. He had a nice body and he was on his balcony frequently, so I definitely noticed him. A couple of months after I moved in, my sister and I were celebrating my birthday with champagne on my balcony, and my shirtless neighbour came outside to his. To be honest the details are fuzzy, but somehow we started hollering across balconies and somehow managed to have a flirtatious discussion at 1000 decibels, that I'm sure we shared with the rest of the complex. Meh. Anyhoo, at one point, he asked for my number and we stopped the madness. We chatted that night for about 20 minutes then I went and got hammered, as I do, for my birthday.

Over the next couple of weeks balcony neighbour Joe and I continued to chat on the phone, and finally after several conversations and a huge bottle of Zimbabwe's finest wine, I invited him over. About 5 minutes later, he knocked on my door. I opened it. HO-LY FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK.

As soon as I opened the door I realized I knew Joe. I knew Joe really well. I knew Joe really, REALLY well, for one night in 2005. That's right...I had already fucked neighbour Joe. We stared at each other and both of our jaws hit the fresh, snap-together-laminate flooring. He came in, and we continued to drink until we lost all perception of how slutty we both are. We never hooked up again and remain friends to this day, how could you not, it's way too funny...and I've been wearing glasses for nearsightedness ever since.